So it seems I am an old-fashioned thinker or something. I read What to expect along with a lot of other baby books, magazines, and internet sites, and frankly- I don’t follow the trend. I use a crib bumper, I don’t do baby wear. I tried to breastfeed but it didn’t work out, so I use formula. I don’t buy organic ANYTHING (unless it’s on sale and cheaper than what I usually would get- but that has yet to happen). I use disposable diapers, and i do a host of other things that would probably make most mommies cringe- like not wash a brand new outfit before putting it on baby!

I have 4 cousins that have babies, and they do everything by the book… Everything from buying all the ‘right’ baby essentials, to making homemade baby food. Cloth diapering, organic clothes, wipes, food… for petes sake, one of them posted an article about how Johnson & johnson products are unsafe and contain formeldyhide! *sigh*

So ranting aside.. is there anyone.. ANYONE who is like me and loves and takes care of their children, uses common sense, but doesn’t follow the trends or the hype?

Please tell me I’m not alone!
I guess I should explain.. it’s not that I am against anything per se, it’s just i have chosen wheat I think works best for my family, and most of the time, what I think is best isn’t what the ‘experts’ believe is best. Oh well.. to each his own. i just can’t stand getting repremanded for my choices when they are just that- CHOICES!
PS- Yes, I do research on things when something comes into question, but usually (such as in the J&J thing) I blow if off as media hype.
I guess I should explain.. it’s not that I am against anything per se, it’s just i have chosen what I think works best for my family, and most of the time, what I think is best isn’t what the ‘experts’ believe is best. Oh well.. to each his own. i just can’t stand getting repremanded for my choices when they are just that- CHOICES! *** Why am I explaining myself anyways hahaha***

PS- Yes, I do research on things when something comes into question, but usually (such as in the J&J thing) I blow if off as media hype.
♥Riyen’s Mom: no, I don’t think I am at all better than anyone! In fact, quite the opposite, I feel like I am somehow lost in the mix because i don’t always understand the new ‘rules’ to parenting. To me, some things just don’t make sense. And if it doesn’t make sense, I don’t do it until it does. Why is it any mom who disagrees with me on here says something to put me down? I have never said anything bad about anyone or anything.

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a little background.

i have a friend, a woman i have been friends with for about 3 or 4 years now. my son and her son are 9 mos. almost to the minute apart. she got pregnant on what i guess would qualify as a one night stand sort of(?). she went on another date w/ a guy she had gone out w/ several months before, and had been hanging out w/ as a friend for sometime in between. they got tipsy, and didnt use any protection even though my friend knew she was ovulating, b/c she didnt tell him to be careful. so she ended up being a single mom, as she didnt really want the dad in the picture(she is in her late 30′s, and the guy was about his mid 20′s and a college student). she eventually told the guy about their son, and got his medical information for her son’s sake.

she told me all of this, and i figured it was her life and she could do what she wanted. she wanted to keep the baby, and her plan was to only give him breastmilk and organic baby food, only use glass and bpa free bottles and only dress him in organic cotton clothing, and have him in organic cloth diapers or the 7th generation diapers at all times. & do all of this on a retail position salary. okay. sure. the organic clothes & diapers seemed a bit much on that budget, but okay.

i went to her baby shower and bought her some of the bottles off of her registry(as there wasnt much on there, and the bottles were pretty expensive for someone who was-and still is- unemployed). the days she spent at the hospital(she had low fluid and had to be induced) i would text her and her doula who was a friend of ours to see how she was doing. it took her about 2 days to finally deliver.

i went to the mall w/ her and her son(who was about 3-4 months at this point). i held him and played w/ him(i love little babies, so i didnt mind) while she went in a few different stores. we got some gelato together, and hung out.

her mother will only keep the baby while she is at work from what i can tell, but if he starts crying, she has to come home from work to get him settled. (i know how hard this can be as my mil is the same way w/ my son for the most part). she was also joking on her fb page that her son took off his shirt so he wouldnt have to go in the car, and she stayed at home w/ him rather than putting his shirt back on and going.

recently however, she keeps blowing off play dates for our son’s at the last minute. we have moved and are down to one car now, and i dont have a license as i have no job to pay for it(we live in a state that you have to be insured to drive). where we have moved however, is not so far away that it would be hard for her to drive, and i have told her that if it is a problem to drive out to where i live, to let me know and i will try to make other arrangements to get to where she is, and she always says that she wants to see the apartment(we have been here about 2 1/2 mos., and we have been trying to set up these play dates the entire time we have lived here b/c her son is now 9 mos. so he is big enough to play w/ my son a bit). we then make plans, and then the day of, right about the time she is supposed to be at my house, i get a phone call: her son is still napping(she doesnt wake him after 2 hours either- she just lets him sleep. the other day she couldnt come over b/c he was "napping" from about 1pm to 4:30 or 5 pm), or her son is suddenly sick and they "don’t want to come over and get us sick".

i understand that children get sick periodically and that things can and do happen sometimes that make it impossible to do things you planned on w/ kids, but today is like the 10th time in a row. i have gotten to the point i dont even bother to do extra cleaning if we have made plans b/c there is no point, i know she won’t show up. my husband is getting fed up b/c he sees how much it hurts me(i dont have many friends, and since i dont have a car or a job, it’s not like i can just go to my friends houses or get out much). i am also getting tired of getting my son excited about getting to play w/ someone, and then they never show up.

what would you think?
if she just told me "hey, i have other plans today" or something like that i wouldnt be mad. but there has been more than a few of the times that i can tell she is outright lying to me, as she is horrible at lying.
i have an 18 mo. old that i take care of virtually by myself all the time. i do not lie about my child napping or being sick to get out of plans i made w/ someone. also, i have seen via her fb page that she goes and sees her other friends a lot(comments from these other friends on her page, along w/ comments from her, whereas i leave a message for her on her page, and there is never a response, written or otherwise).
this has also been going on for about 4 mos., & she hasnt been worried about or talked to her son’s father in about 2 years.
im really not trying to be insensitive, im just getting the feeling like she really doesnt have any interest in seeing me or my son, which if that is the case, i would rather her just not contact me.

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I just had my son 3 months ago. I think that my husband and I are doing a pretty damn good job.

However, I think that my SIL is trying to do ANYTHING in her power to be "better" than me. On purpose. She has this type of personality so it is pretty definite that she is trying to make me feel as if anything I do, she is going to make a point to do it better.

She is now apx. 5 months pregnant…first baby. Anytime we go out together and I am picking up things for my son (i.e diapers) she says something like "oh, I heard that organic diapers don’t have chlorine in them so I am going to use those"…even though she has already bought a bunch of non-organic clothes and baby shampoos and such so using organic diapers is use-less in her situation. She is just saying things like this to make it sound like she is "doing something better" than me.

Another example. Last night my brother, my SIL, and myself all went out to the mall (with my son) to do some last minute shopping. I drove. She says "when I have my baby I am not ever going to take her out in the car…only to the doctors because it is soo dangerous out on the road". She said this because I was bringing my son out…as I always do…in the car!

Then she will always ask me what I think of "this and that" and then completely ignore my answer…almost like I am giving her unwanted advice that she doesn’t want to hear….even though she asked…I swear she just asks to hear my answer so that later she can come up with "something better" that she is going to do…. LOL

Now she is the type of person that doesn’t listen to anyone. No matter what you say…it goes in one ear and out the other….how do I deal with this?
Another thing she said yesterday that I just thought about. She knows that my husband and I had a ton of money saved up for our son in a bank account before he was born. We had to drain that account when we unexpectedly had to move while I was 8 months pregnant and needed the money to have a place to live. So now she is always saying how she has ALL this money already saved up for their baby and how ALL of her money goes to her baby…I feel like she is trying to throw a dig out at me because we had to use the money for a place to live.

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I came across a site a while back that sold organic clothes specifically designed for babies and toddlers that wear cloth diapers. I thought I bookmarked it but I guess I didn’t. Does anyone know about this site or another similar one?
Because I am starting a cloth diaper business and would like to sell that particular type of clothing.

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Sometimes I see comments that Carter’s clothes has poor quality. Honestly, I don’t see anything wrong with their clothes, they have cute stuff and it made out of cotton and they even have organic clothes. So what is your opinion – does carters clothes has poor or good quality and why?

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I’m looking for great websites that have REALLY CUTE organic clothes for newborns

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