Monday, July 25th, 2011 at
12:14 am
* Who John Jacob Jingle Heimershmitt is.
* How to change a diaper in the dark, in a parked car, on a standing child
and all of the above simultaneously.
* Which lines of The Cat in the Hat and If I Ran the Circus can be skipped
over without a child noticing.
* How bright a 3 a.m. full moon is.
* The design marvels of hooded towels, Velcro-strap shoes and mitten clips.
* Locations of public restrooms all across town.
* Why anyone would bother retracing their steps for miles just to retrieve a
lost blankie.
* That tigers live in the trees in our backyard.
* How to open a van door while bobbling 2 lunch boxes, two extra coats, a
purse, a diaper bag and a baby.
* That solid white socks get lost in the dryer at a much slower rate than do
the mates of patterned socks that coordinate to special outfits.
* How little sleep a human body truly needs to function.
* Almost every Disney lyric ever penned.
* How to spell amoxicillin, let alone
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