I don’t know how to truly forgive my in-laws ?
Thursday, July 1st, 2010 at
10:28 pm
You are currently browsing comments. If you would like to return to the full story, you can read the full entry here: “I don’t know how to truly forgive my in-laws ?”.
Filed under: Baby Clothes
Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!
I don’t think you are in the wrong. For crying out loud this is your son your talking about. The grandmother was in the wrong for hiding the child, but my question to you is why would she even think that she could do this? Did your ex husband tell her that you were an unfit parent? If there is no reason behind her actions but pure spite, then you have every reason to never even want to talk to the woman again. You don’t mess with a mothers child. Mothers have natural insits that would kill for their children, does this stupid woman not realize this?
The only way I would forgive her was if she was to truly sit down and apoligize for her out of control actions, so yes I’d forgive but never forget and not let her watch your child for no reason what so ever….she would of lost that priviledge if it was my son!
Ok, the bottomline is you forgave your husband and you have to find a way to forgive them Of course they were wrong! It does not matter. Forgiveness is your only chance to have peace and a functional realationship with your husband’s side of the family…And of course Prayer..I have to rely on my faith to get me through horrible times. Prayer works!!! If you have a faith…lean on it now..
i dont think there is anyway…find you some good child care for that baby
Jesus cast our sins into the sea of forgetfulness, as far as the East is to the West, from one nail pierced hand to the other.
He tells us to forgive those who trespass against us 70 times 7.
And deep within our flesh wars against our spirit.
But still, He reminds us, 70 times 7.
It’s your choice but remember, you’re learning about forgiveness and unconditional love.
The lesson isn’t over yet.
You’ve married into an evil family. It’s lose/lose.
I finally walked away from the psycho family I married into. They treated me like sh*t for years then treated me like sh*t for leaving and forcing a "divorce" *ssshhhh* in the family. :-O
F*ck ‘em. I wore the plastic smile for years. Hopefully you’ll eventually see what a mistake the whole situation is and leave it. Wait until your kiddo is older though bc they will fight with a vengeance for custody.
And yes, the court will grant joint unless there are extenuating circumstances.
I say that you can be a family without having to go over to your Mother-in-Laws house and pretend to like them. I don’t blame you. It would be hard to forgive them. I would stay as far away from them as possible. If you ever have another problem, they will do the same thing again. You can be a family without them. Let him go. They are HIS family.
Your mom in law is a nuts and you need a separate sitter. My mom in law stood for me because my first hubby was a drug addict. Try to have a nice lunch with her and maybe she is embarrassed too. No kids allowed, just a woman to woman lunch and listen to her side. I hope the best for you and your family. Sometimes forgiveness can work.
WOW
after reading all that, all i can say it WOW
i would have a tough time forgiving anyone if someone back stabbed me to that extent where my child was basically held captive
random thoughts of going on a shooting rampage with a 50 round clip sound in order…. but that’s just me…
you have to ask yourself how strong is your marriage..
and where is the support on your side of the family?
as you know if it hits that fan again he ( and the child ) will be running to his side of the family again.. and that pretty much lets you know where his loyalties lies… and it’s not with you, personally i would quietly seek a divorce and then one day up and leave, with child and have him secretly dropped off to your side of the family.. say in California if possible ( Europe would even be better )
since you can never fully trust him nor his family, you can never forgive them, think of them as a snake, laying low, quite and ready to strike if angered… and you got your situation pretty much covered
I feel you on this, 12 years ago I lost my daughter to this situation here in Michigan when you have a baby you don’t have custody if the fathers name is on the birth certificate either one has the custody it’s 50/50 so one day for x-mas vacation he gets her and never returns her after the vacation all the while obtaining a lawyer the courts gave him custody because he had more money and I had Two other children that weren’t his and I was on welfare I got off my a** married the dude I was living with got me a job I own a Business and made sure to never get in this situation again so yours turned out okay but you have to put up with the in-laws and they sound like complete a** holes just try to do your best raising your child and try for that day care.
I cannot imagine how you must feel but you are going to have to do the right thing and it is this, immature people [children] show their feelings, but as adults we often have to hide our feelings for the good of the peace, when you drop the baby off you do know he isn’t being abused right? he’s probably better off there, than in a day care catching colds every month. Remember also the more people who love a child the better off he is, he will have laughter, smiles, good food and warmth, millions of kids do not have that these days, but he will have fond memories. Secondly, yes you should always accompany your husband to the inlaws gatherings, if i could, you could. It shows unity between you and you man, as time goes by it’s best for your son to witness that. My mil would swear at me, [cal me whore etc.] gossip and even attacked me once, –under no provocation, she was a drinker. I was ignored by everyone also, who would speak their country’s language [italian] while living in my country, just so i couldn’t understand them. I would camly go and watch t.v. & talk to any children around. They wouldn’t even call me when they had started eating dinner, not even my ‘stupid’ husband. When he was around them he became 7 yrs old all over again. Well in our case the yrs rolled by, we moved far away and my husband doesn’t even see them, but never in any way did i tell anyone off. Never in 25 yrs did i even recieve one b-day card from any of them, although they would have parties for one another. Never did i gossip or try to get anyone to like me. I put it all in God’s hands, they mean zero to me, but the thing is i never stooped to their level. You can show class too, bring a book to read, learn to knit, watch t.v. bide your time, show them that it is their problem not yours. Learn to trust in Jesus for all of your problems. He truely will be your strength.