How to deal with a step childs parent ! Help !?
Thursday, July 15th, 2010 at
8:01 pm
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Filed under: Baby Clothes
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First off, ice hockey tickets – that’s got to go. I know he’d like to spend time with his son but you can have fun at the park for free. You can go to an arcade and play for 2 hours on ten dollars. And why can’t he at least split skating lessons with his ex?
It seems to me, don’t take this the wrong way, your partner is not ready for a new family. He’s still too attached to his old one.
Talking about finances, it sometimes doesn’t get through to people. But when you show them on paper, they tend to get it in a visual sense. Make a list of your expenses: Current family expenses (whatever you spend on your family), what he spends on his son/ex, and expenses you will need for the new baby. If he doesn’t reason with you, you should probably leave him because he’s not in a mental position to raise another child.
Ok..U r not going to like this..but here we go…U want him 2 cut down on the ice hockey? How bout U cut down on the "trim" @ the hairdressers every 6-8 weeks? Make it every 4 months. And clothes 4 ur daughter are NOT a necessity! They are a luxury item! And where is this $$ coming from to re-do her room, the step-son’s & the baby’s? Sounds to me like U BOTH need a lesson in financing! Although I will agree that the ice hockey tickets are WAY over the top. U 2 need to sit down and talk about it. If he can’t grasp the concept of not spending $$..then U might want to get another bank account and move most of it into there (until he learns 2 not spend). Pay the bills out of the main account and then move the rest..except a set amount..into the other account. Might cause a fight..but some1 has 2 take the reigns! And talking isn’t working! Time for action!
Look. Having step-kids is ALWAYS a big drama! I have 3 myself (2boys-11&5 & a girl-3) plus my own kids (all girls-16,13 & 10). 4 some reason, it seems to me that hubby’s kids always have a chip on their shoulder! Where my kids have accepted them as siblings! Hubby’s kids (mainly the 11yr old) get mouthy, whiney (when they don’t get what they think they deserve), say that he favors my kids over them, whatever they can come up w/! And it all comes down to how they are raised! My steps are 650 miles away..so we only get them on school holidays (I don’t think I could handle that 11yr olds mouth 4 more then that). U 2 need 2 SERIOUSLY sit down & talk about his behavior. U also need 2 clarify what ur role as step-mom is (in his mind). Are U allowed to discipline him? Or is that strictly dad’s territory? Tell him that U don’t appreciate his son disrespecting U like he does. Would he allow ur new child 2 do the same? Basically, U 2 really need to get these things straight b4 this new baby arrives! Or there is going to b even more BS in ur house!